The Speech of Your Life...

Inspiration and Empowerment

Laugh a minute isn’t it? This world we live in. The dumbest television sitcom with the shallowest premise can last too many seasons. We escape into humor. We chop our messages into sound bites and smaller bytes and surf for the next form of entertainment. Indeed, the saddening trend toward dumbing down our children was part of a new opportunity years ago, in Bill Gates mid-90s forecast of the “entertainment economy”. The market niche for computer games and endless video barrage on our senses grows and grows. We spend a lot of time indulging ourselves in entertainment diversions to relieve everyday stresses. We lose patience with serious messages as our brains are now media-programmed for short, clippy and comedic writing.

I have a boundless sense of humor.  No topic is taboo. It gets me in trouble. I enjoy when a movie makes fun of itself, and when a politician lightens the moment with his own foibles of misunderstanding and correction, like “I’m sorry I’ve been a schmuck on this issue by not paying attention. But I want to be a good schmuck and help.” By way of humor, we lighten our personal load and enable the most frail and human connection to, follow me on this, ourselves. They say God has an ironic sense of humor, and doesn’t it make our lives more interesting to notice the timing of our most painful “funniest video” moments.

Yet, the world’s youngest billionaire made his fortune by enabling the human connection, inventing Facebook. Ding! There is an obvious truth there – people seek more than entertainment - we seek human connection. A great underlying need is better understood. People want to join together, to know and to be known, and to influence. That's a long way from the numbing sitcom.    

This is why the serious speech is so important. Serious needs are endless; to advocate for a non-profit which feeds the shut-ins and the homeless, to defend a niche community against the lashes of harsh judgment and humiliation, or making an appeal for better lighting to reduce crime. The serious topics of life command our thoughtful brains, reach our hearts, compel concrete action, and change the world into the better place. Our better future is directed by serious thought.

One of the great orators forever emblazoned upon the wall of history is Winston Churchill. He was known for his ability to lead with serious thought. His speech writing dealt with a tough world. He was also known for his high-level, timely and razor-sharp witty remarks; “The length of this document defends it well against the risk of its being read”. There was serious thought, even in the jokes. Even very late in his career, however, Churchill would puke before going onstage. He took it all very seriously and wanted his work, his deep thoughts, to matter. They did.

Inspiration to speak on serious topics and to maintain a serious tone comes from within; personal exposure, respect for the topic, respect for others feelings, awareness of the consequences (both of the issue and of saying nothing), and the great hope that your voice will change someone’s views. All that is missing is the will to hold a serious tone for a few minutes.

Empower yourself to speak out by recognizing that there is a great need for serious thought which can lead to serious changes. Draw inspiration from your role models. Gather your fortitude to step up when you know that before you lies the opportunity to make a difference.

It’s easy to stand out in a crowd of funny people when you actually have something to say. Your moment can matter, not just because of your fortitude... but because it's probably the right thing to do. 

 

Why You

Not too many people have ascended Mt. Everest with 137 people in tow, but that guy on the Discovery channel last week has.  He’ll be in demand as a motivational speaker for the rest of his life.  Not too many people have flown with wings and a jet pack attached to their bodies to cross the English channel.  Bam.  Fifteen minutes of fame. 

It doesn’t take losing a limb, rocket science or Wiley Coyote like tendencies.  There is a demand for a speaker who has a tale of their own, a story which is somehow fascinating and stands apart from everyday life.   If we research a new effect of a combination of drugs and re-grow limbs, we’ll stand out.  If we chair the committee to design a bigger oil-sucking water cleaner, we’ll get some attention.  If we spend a career as a marine biologist fascinated with squid, we’ll stand out.  But let me ask – how much do you really relate to those speakers?  Are you about to close a multi-billion dollar deal on your home-grown business?  Are you recovering from a plane crash?  Did you manage to outlive the statute of limitations on your Swiss bank heist, and you are feeling remorseful now?  Lucky you, the talk shows and speakers bureaus are looking for you. 

But what about the rest of the eager speaking talent, the skilled but “regular” human populace? What if we lose someone and live through it?  Doesn’t everyone?  What if we’ve loved and lost?  Doesn’t everybody?  How interesting can that be?  Who wants to hear another story about the pain of life?  No one?  Oh, contraire.  The most interesting stories lie in the smallest and most common details of human connection. 

Some of the most valued and most memorable motivational speakers simply instill a new vision of an everyday experience.  They give us their story, told through their unique perspective, often rising above pain.  A divorced mother steps forward to articulate of the unspeakable pain and loss of her daughter to a life of drugs and prisons.  A father of six speaks of how proud he has become of his children as they have formed a team to help the disadvantaged.  A child dying of cancer stands before an audience to speak of the endless joy in his heart for the many gifts of care and love and comfort he has received to ease his pain.   In their stories are the moments of human realizations and everyday emotional triumphs.  From them, we are encouraged to see beyond our day by day challenge, to lighten the load of our own lives, to see through the eyes of optimism.  Often, all it takes is seeing life a little differently to find lessons to share.  With a little self-examination we can find life’s details which just beg to be told.  A child points out the ridiculousness of our sensitivities.  The suddenness of death reminds us of the joys of living.  A co-worker reminds us that our values should be with our families.  Victims of natural events often have amazing stories of loss and triumph.  Lonely vigils are kept in remote places, where great thoughts can emerge.  A spouse encourages a hobby which brings that most elusive of treasures, “quality time”. 

For the aspiring speaker, impassioned by the desire to make their skills of value, the search for valuable material is no further away than the experience of the heart.  Loss and tragedy find us all.  So does joy and enthusiasm.  What did we learn?  How do we overcome?  What will come next?  In what small way did we improve ourselves in the midst of change, turmoil, or conflict or embarrassment?  To find valuable speeches within you, perhaps a simple question can assist…  How do you value your moments? 

Beyond dialogue

Plato condensed the definition of dialogue to argumentative conversation. Apparently a politician was listening. I appreciate a civil argument for or against any position. Conservative or liberal, dog or cat, solar or wind.  Dialogue should be open and at least two way.  Modern language analysts (like those over at languagemonitor.org) look for trends in word use, word evolution, word invention, topics, analyze speech content for coherency, and they make some sometimes funny leaps about trends.  The dialogue about dialogue is endless.  

Think monologue> dialogue> discourse. Discourse is different. Discourse is control and knowledge of a position and the topic. It is dialogue, but the bigger idea.  Considered formal discussion or debate, discourse is studied as a sociology unto itself.  It is the communication of debate, contrast, and possibilities which shape ideas into futures. Abstract as it may seem, CNN and other media groups put a lot of effort into understanding the discourse of politics, to discern the direction of societies values.  Studies of discourse investigate the relationships of language, structure and group, including politics, feminist studies, anthropology, ethnography, cultural studies, literary theory, and the philosophies of science.  For instance, comparing Barrack Obama’s inauguration speech to John F. Kennedy’s implies a drop in the grade level of the modern dialogue, and therefore a lowering of the expectations inherent in social discourse. Naturally, the notions of discourse itself are subject to further discourse.

In the foreground, language is evolving speedily.  Our environment of change requires new words, useful and cultural. Got Web2.0? It is considered a word.  Defriend anyone lately?  You wouldn’t have before 2007, and three years later, millions everyday.   And I bet you know the meaning of the word.  Consider, too, that internationalization hybridizes language, and a lack of connection can be met with blank stares and smilence.

What does this have to do with giving a better speech?  Our discourse establishes social context - “How we say it” matters a great deal. As the world rapidly shrinks, local dialogues include world issues. Common concerns ask for solutions not just for the neighbors, but for the global neighborhood.   Young leaders, like those at yesworld.org, and the entrepreneurs at netsquared.org are taking on problems which reach the remote villages of other continents, then taking the stage to encourage others to lend a hand.  Their discourse is what you will hear from future politicians.  The future is an engaging global discussion; businesses are competing for the ears and eyes of the globe – messaging must be uniquely cutting-edge as dialogue and discourse rapidly evolve within a changing communications landscape.   As we make our points and take our stands, to our groups, customers, and post our messages for the world, we could strike the highly sought “viral” chord with our message - if it is both in modern dialogue and in step with the discourse. 

More and more, a grass-roots common discourse is binding the world. Language is both simplifying in order to reach broader audiences and adapting to changing technical and social standards.  Common messages and concerns now span the globe (who speaks which actual language is another topic).  If you want be in step with who is heard and how they say it, to understand the largest communities the world has ever known, look to young leaders and to the social analysts to see what will be the discourse of great speeches of coming days. 

That connection

“As the environment shifts to more social, are our brains actually changing the way we process spoken information?”  Ya gotta love a thinker.  A probing question opened the Q&A session of my discussion about presenting vs. communicating.  I had made the point that the social sites are just a display of peoples needs to connect with people and people are looking for social and ethical messages from (our) leadership. 

As the world has shrunk through technology, so expectations have changed.  Geez, we’ve got grandmas paying nightly visits to grandchildren across the keyboard.   We’ve got live internet video enabling greater emotional availability, and tearing down the barriers of cultures.  We’ve got sites which allow us to monitor oil spills, check the security status of town squares, and to crawl inside the space station to cheer up our space nerds. And to think, we’re just getting started. 

Presentation and communication are very different things and what people crave today is a connection with their (corporate) leadership, not just a dry view from the top.  Inspiration is not the same as motivation to action.  Inspiration taps into the need to be more, to rise to the occasion, and better yet, to create the occasion of helping others rise.  Vision is a matter of passion, and very much dependent upon getting the audience to “see” in the minds eye the vision of organizational performance and need fulfillment, to cause inspiration.  It's like a mental food chain; presentation>communication>vision>inspiration. 

Companies (and people) used to “present” an image.  Changes have emerged with the broad adoption of Corporate Social Responsibility policies and programs, enabling even more community awareness by sharing the company resources for common good.  Organizations of all sizes are adopting Youtube, Facebook and Twitter to connect employees and clients.  The shift to “connection” is light years beyond the simple presentation.  People (and companies) now experience fewer barriers to human connection, and to the question, our expectations of public messaging are moving with these abilities. 

Does all this change what people are listening for?  I answered, “Yes.  We can’t change the way our brains are wired so readily, but people are changing their orientation about what they are listening for. It’s a matter of evolving personal values.” 

You are probably selling something, whether you are selling corn seed or international management services, or ideas in your department.  Speakers are advocates in every setting, whether it’s the monthly status meeting, or the highest-ranking annual vision statement.  As speakers, we should be aware that people are listening for the human connection, the personal implications of every topic.  The audience is actually becoming psychologically “wired” for greater human connection.  "What’s in it for me?" is becoming "what’s in it for us?". People are now listening for words of compassion, emotion, and stories which evoke the sense of connection. By including the human concerns, quality of life, morale or social issues, speakers fill a valuable gap in normal human interactions. 

The question clarified for the room that yes, people are changing what they are actually hearing.  If a leader is not advocating active personal and organizational connections, the message is missing the contemporary target, the mindset of the era.  Are our brains changing?  DNA reorganizes much slower than that Facebook update to the Blackberry.  We are still the same humans.  We just expect leadership and speakers to see our world the way we do – connected. 

From the heart

She said, “If you are not coming from the heart, are you doing your life’s work?”  The audience had grown pin-drop silent.  The question lingered in the air.  As she paused, she exchanged a few seconds of eye-contact linkage with more than one audience member, and glanced downward quietly before resuming all with a bright smile. 

Packaged in a classic formula, it was a sudden undeniable meeting point, previewed by great humor and story-telling and climax.  She turned her topic to seriousness, toward the audience, and asked us to consider our private authentic inspiration.  Therein was the matter. She continued, “What is heart? Well, are you sharing your real passions and giving your creative whole to what you do?”  She reminded us to be real, human, and linked to each other, not just our sales goals or our bank balances.

After a compelling story of her life’s struggle and her evolution to become a powerful speaker, she had led us to a quintessential “moment”.  She told us all what she knew, and what we could feel, about being in touch with our individual sense of purpose.  In a moment of introspection offered by someone I will never meet, she had led me to pause all other thought.  Business, money, things, are meaningless in the end; it is the human relationship which matters when we reflect.  She was revealing, compelling, and pardon the redundancy, connecting.  That speaking effect can go right past the brain wiring - to remind us to call on our deepest strengths.  There is no higher mission for the public speaker.

Under the pressure to deliver numbers, it’s easy to get stuck in the role of simple seller, corporate hype-r, or to re-gurge the government line.  In a world of fear and everyday drama and threats to our security, and tight budgets, hype can cause an intended beneficiary to wear their guard, and in effect ignore most "pitches".  Adding the human element can open the door to real thought, and real change. 

Back to that classic formula.  For speeches, it can be the same as movies.  Character–conflict–drama–pain-resolution through enlightment.  From there, what do you want the audience to understand, what is the essence of the lesson?  Bring direct focus to the take-away.  Ask for contemplation, or commitment.  Telling your relationship dramas is the story of your greatest highs and most painful lows.  It’s been said that to witness an emotional moment is to be directly allied to the energy of it (maybe this is why top actors are paid so much). Sympathies will flow, and the audience will be in the perfect position to receive your greater lesson.  If you now ask, “Isn’t that manipulating the audience?”, you are indeed in touch.  I retort, “Or is that connecting by our truest common understanding?”  It depends partly on the topic, but more upon your attitude. 

One word of caution, as discussed in another post emotional topics take time to prepare for.  Be sure you are beyond any pain in order to use a story of heart-felt experience.  It’s easy to lose your point in your own emotions. 

The rare speaker asks us to think and feel in ways which bind us to greater needs, to know our hearts by offering theirs.  When one sees a moment of personal connection offered by a speaker, it is then that our egos are neutralized, our personal issues are trivialized, and we are called to a greater sense of purpose.  That speaker reminds us of our humanity.